Kobayashi Maru

What would the Bible ladies say right now?

Those voices of my childhood

Women who cared

Who taught me the stories of broken people God used anyway

 

In this moment where there seem no good options

And feelings are more than I can process

So much loss

So much grief

 

Not trusting myself or my feelings

I try to do what’s right for others

No matter how much it hurts

No matter how big the sacrifice

 

Selling my dream house

Losing my dream call

Leaving my home culture

Saying goodbye to loved ones

 

No more Mardi Gras

No more swingin’

No more changing seasons

No more how y’all doin’

 

My soul rips in two

Can it heal?

Will it heal?

How long will it take?

 

A mentor takes his own life this week

I get it

Sometimes the pain is too much to bear

No Win Scenario

 

Red Angel come from the future

And show me that it will be alright

That I will be able to come home again

That there will be a space for me

 

For now, I must wait

I must press on

I must make what I can of what I have

For those I have birthed into the world

 

But, the pain

It is almost too much to bear

What would those Bible ladies say

In a Kobayashi Maru?


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